Be polite, some rules of etiquette. Benefits of Polite Behavior
It's not always easy to work on yourself and become the best person. Some common goals, like losing weight, quitting smoking, or being nicer to others, seem difficult to achieve. In fact, if you use some simple tips, you can be polite more often without extra effort. Remember that being kind and considerate to others is very important, these are traits that people value very highly. You will always be able to make a good impression on others, your mood will improve and your stress level will decrease. Showing courtesy will soon become quite natural. Where to start? Consider these recommendations!
Be kinder
The first rule of etiquette is to always strive for kindness. You cannot be polite and kind to some and rude to others, this is wrong. If you do this, you will get a reputation for being two-faced, which is probably not what you want.
Don't be late
It is quite clear that anything happens in life, but it is impolite to be very late for a meeting. If you agreed to meet at a restaurant at seven, be there at that time. If you tend to be late, try to leave early to give yourself some extra time.
Learn everyday conversation
When a polite person meets a new interlocutor, he does not interrogate him with an endless list of questions. He listens, asks, actively supports the conversation. Treat a new acquaintance as an old friend - and then it will be much easier for you to have such a conversation. 
Listen
People love to talk about themselves. When you are having a conversation, ask the person questions about himself, especially if you have met recently. An attentive listener immediately arouses sympathy in the interlocutor. 
Use names
The easiest way to be polite and make a good impression is to use the name of the person you are talking to. This may seem like a small thing, but it's not. People love the sound of their name and have a liking for whoever mentions it, so be sure to take advantage of it. 
Don't share personal details
Polite people know how to conduct a conversation and what topics are best to dwell on. You should not share details of your personal life or discuss gossip you read in in social networks, if you want to make a good impression on others.
Analyze your jokes
Sure, everyone loves a good joke, but not everyone likes the same things. If you find yourself in mixed company, it is important for you to be careful about the jokes you tell. Perhaps something will seem rude to other people. Avoid vulgarity and offensive language.
Stop swearing
If you don't watch what words you use, it shows that you have no respect for children and the elderly. Polite people are attentive to others and do not swear, especially in mixed company. 
Avoid gossip
Sometimes it is difficult to resist gossip, especially if something impressive has happened. However, a polite person does not discuss others behind their back. Don't listen to or participate in such conversations, it's simple.
Give compliments
Being polite also means being complimentary, so don't be afraid to tell your friends how much you love their new hairstyle. It's just polite.
Learn how to introduce people correctly
Introduce stranger new company - this is what every polite person should be able to do. You should maintain eye contact, use simple phrases and an appropriate title for the person you are introducing. You can also look for commonalities between the people you meet so that a conversation can flow naturally.
Learn to introduce yourself
A polite person knows how to introduce himself, it's simple: you need to step forward, smile, extend your hand for a handshake and say your name. After this, it should be noted that the acquaintance is an honor for you.
Don't touch other people without permission
A handshake when meeting someone is perfectly acceptable, but all other types of physical contact are not appropriate. Do not pat others on the back, do not hug, or touch others on the shoulder or arm unless the person you are talking to does this themselves.
Don't forget to be attentive
If you want to show politeness, be more attentive to others - hold the door for the person following you, do not overtake on the road, think about others, and not just about yourself. These are little things, but they are very important.
Be careful what you say
Everyone has their own opinion, and sometimes you can react extremely emotionally even to something quite harmless. Polite people try to prevent this and do not share their opinions on controversial topics.
Say hello to others
To be a more polite person, simply say hello to your neighbors, coworkers, and other people you meet regularly. It's very simple, but important. 
Remember important little things about people
Try to be more attentive and remember significant details about your interlocutors. Anyone will be flattered if you remember something they have mentioned before. It shows that you care.
Respect others
You should be more attentive and kinder to others, respect their differences and opinions. Even if you disagree on something, you should not be rude to the person. Try to be understanding and not be too harsh. 
Don't judge other people
You must understand that all people have their own problems and their own motivations. Treat others the way you would like to be treated. Remember that you can never know exactly what another person is going through. 
Don't forget about etiquette when communicating on the phone
When starting a conversation, say hello softly. Speak calmly and clearly so that the person can hear you. If you are calling from public place, do not report any personal information so that others can hear her. Try never to raise your voice.
Give people a second chance
This does not mean that you should forgive those who offend you, however, sometimes it is worth being more lenient towards others. Perhaps your coworker isn't that introverted after all, but just had a rough day.
Radiate positivity
Polite people are usually positive. When you speak positively about yourself and the world, you not only feel happier, but you also make others feel more comfortable around you. 
Learn basic table manners
You must understand the basics of good table manners and etiquette. There are quite obvious things, for example, that burping is unacceptable and that you cannot put your elbows on the table. In addition, if you have several cutlery, you should start using the one that lies at the very edge; when talking with other people, you should put the cutlery on the table; while eating, do not hunch over or reach for dishes that are far away - in this case, you just need to ask to pass something closer to you.
Use the napkin correctly
At dinner, always place a napkin on your lap; this should be done after those who invited you have laid out their napkins. Never place a napkin behind the collar of your shirt or wipe your face with it - you can only lightly blot it.
Use polite phrases
Sometimes you can become more polite with minimal effort; just say “thank you” and “please” more often. The path to being a kind and considerate person starts small.
What is politeness?
Politeness is a person’s ability to communicate with other people without conflict and with respect. A polite person is pleasant to talk to, in his manner of conversation, in his manners. In general, he seems to show his interlocutor that he respects him, that he enjoys talking with him, and most importantly, that the person himself received a good upbringing.
Why is politeness so important?
Perhaps you will argue that politeness is a vestige of modern society that only the arrogant and shameless survive. Yes, of course, these are extremely necessary skills for a middle manager, for office plankton who are ready to devour each other for the opportunity to occupy a leather chair. But for some reason, sitting in the chair is a polite and calm person who can show toughness without resorting to yelling and market tricks, but instill such fear that it would be better to swear. What's the secret? The secret is inner strength which comes from politeness and good manners. Harmony with yourself is achieved through respect for the whole world, to comprehend new things, and politeness will help you with this.
How to become polite?
Politeness is not only memorized rules of etiquette, but also a person’s character. The person may put their elbows on the table, but still come across as polite and tactful. Try to follow these principles to become a polite, pleasant and positive person. And you will earn plus one to your karma.
Keep your promises. Nobody likes liars.
Listen to your interlocutor, do not interrupt him, even if you already understand him. Let the person finish his thought. You are not at the market, have respect for the thoughts of your interlocutor, let him speak.
Don’t harshly criticize something in front of someone you don’t know. For example, you criticize vegetarianism, but your interlocutor, it turns out, does not eat meat. It can get pretty awkward. You will not deliberately offend a person without even really getting to know him. So make jokes with friends, not just acquaintances.
Don't forget the magic words: thank you, please. Try to use them more often, and you will notice that those around you will change their attitude towards you.
Don’t swear, this is still an indicator of your level.
When you visit, take something for tea or a souvenir.
When you are driving, please turn off your high beams and follow the basic rules of courtesy and traffic.
Be condescending in conversation, as many people have so many opinions. If you disagree with your interlocutor, there is no need to prove that you are right, foaming at the mouth. The fact that you express your opinion in convulsions will not change your idea of the subject of the dispute, but it will be unpleasant for your interlocutor.
If you find yourself in an unfamiliar place, take a closer look at other people. They will give you an example of how to behave in this situation. There is no shame in asking if something is not clear. If you say: “Please help me figure it out,” I think anyone will answer you, and there is nothing wrong with that.
A handshake says a lot about a person. There is a whole science dedicated to this issue. A firm handshake with a look into the eyes of the interlocutor is considered normal. If a person offers his hand as if asking, with his palm up, then he is not confident in himself. If a person offers his hand like a royal person, palm down, then he has high self-esteem and signs of a tyrant. According to old rules of etiquette, older men and women themselves offer their hand for a handshake. This is considered a sign of respect for them, meaning they have the opportunity to judge whether you are worthy of their handshake or not. So, if you are a woman or an older man, keep in mind that the interlocutor may expect you to be the first to extend your hand to him for a handshake.
Standards of politeness and etiquette
You could write a longer work than War and Peace on the topic of table etiquette. In modern society it has become a little easier, just remember the basic rules:
Rules of etiquette in modern society
- if a girl wants to eat, then there is nothing wrong with telling the guy about it. After all, people often meet after work. But ordering the most expensive dishes is bad manners.
- if you sat with friends in a cafe, ordered little, and your friends offer to split the bill equally, you have the opportunity to say that you did not expect to spend a large amount and pay only for yourself. If they start reproaching you, it means your friends are insincere with you.
- Regarding expensive gifts, there is no clear restriction on etiquette: this can be accepted from a fan, this cannot be accepted. If you feel uncomfortable with a gift or you don’t like it, then you can return it, saying that the gift is very expensive and you will not be able to give something of equal value in the near future.
The spirit of the street is not always rough and gloomy; the street can be cheerful and good-natured.
Photo by Reuters
The situation of politely treating our neighbors seems to have become extreme in our country. When I come to Moscow, I often catch puzzled looks when I say “hello” or “thank you, goodbye,” for example, at the post office or at telephone exchange. The feeling of the fate of a lonely mastodon does not leave me even on the subway, when I take a step back in front of an approaching carriage, rather than rushing to an empty seat, pushing my neighbors aside.
I wasn't like this before. After living in Berlin for a while, I became like this. To my great surprise, I noticed irreversible changes in myself. I was influenced by the general atmosphere created in society, the style of communication with each other, which does not depend on the social affiliation of an individual. Politeness in Western European countries apparently settles somewhere on a subconscious level. If you want, it is absorbed with mother's milk and remains at the level of instinct.
It is interesting that Berliners are considered the most uncouth in Germany itself. West Germans are reluctant to go to Berlin. In their view, the level of rudeness in the German capital exceeds the acceptable level. For example, passers-by on the street do not smile and do not stop if you ask them to show the way. In such cases, you can often hear: “Sorry, I don’t have time.” In stores, it happens that sellers do not start joking friendly with customers, and in institutions, although politeness reigns, it is cold.
All this, in the German understanding, falls into the category of rudeness. That is why the move of government officials from Bonn to Berlin after the transfer of the capital turned into a farce. After all, well-bred Rhineans demanded significant compensation from the federal budget for being forced to leave their homes and move to “impudent” Berlin.
I know a university teacher from Cologne who has been traveling on high-speed trains for 15 years now, not working, covering a distance of 800 km there and back twice a week. She explains her motive by her reluctance to move to an impolite area.
But what is it, Berlin impoliteness? In fact, the gap between Berliners inhabiting the territory of the former Prussia and residents of other regions of Germany is not so great. The character of “true Prussians” is simplicity and directness of communication. Native Berliners have a healthy sense of humor, which they call “dry.” It is probably their Prussian directness that repels the cunning Rhinelanders or Bavarians, who do not even understand the rude northern humor.
However, in the area of standard politeness, which makes life incredibly easier, Berliners are not far behind their compatriots.
For example, while standing in line at some institution, they maintain a “distance of correctness.” Even where there is no special dividing line drawn, as we have in some banks. It is believed that conversations with officials are an intimate matter and those standing in line are not obliged to know what problems concern their neighbor.
Although in Russia, as in Germany, it is not customary to ask about earnings, and the topic of money generally belongs to the “taboo” category, this principle does not apply, for example, in savings banks, airline ticket offices and other places where people receive or give their money. When paying for an apartment or a telephone, many strive to squeeze closer to the person in front. Whether the reason for this is Russian conciliarism, or the feeling of familiarity rooted in the socialist era is difficult to say. For some reason, physical intimacy in bank queues still remains the norm in our lives.
However, all our immigrants from Russia, living in Germany, immediately adapted to the conditions of formal civil politeness. Now they all stand in queues decorously, do not be rude to their neighbors, do not spit and smile in stores. They have forgotten how to drive aggressively on the roads and are waiting for the green light to cross the street. How can we explain this change?
Apparently, public intolerance for the cheeky, boorish style. The external atmosphere influences each individual person. And no matter how rude and boorish he may be, he tries to fit in in society. And vice versa - nice and friendly people, which I am sure are the majority of Russians, become infected with an atmosphere of rudeness and hostility, unwittingly adapting to the general style.
German friends who often visit our country tell me that, in principle, the Russian people are warm-hearted and hospitable. But... They all wonder what happens to nice and polite people as soon as they leave their native territory of home or workplace. Many people are surprised by the expression of contemptuous indifference on the faces of most people. For some, the style of communication of Russian citizens is reminiscent of the rough simplicity of communication in the former GDR - they say, the socialist system is to blame for this. Many explain rudeness by the difficulties of life in modern Russia. We tend to attribute this to general national lack of culture.
To the latter one can only answer that the share of compatriots with higher education in Russia much more than in Germany. In addition, I know firsthand that it is more often possible to meet a truly cultured or simply intelligent person with amazing erudition and deep knowledge in our country. However, for some reason the general background of politeness and attentiveness to one’s neighbor is much more pronounced in Western Europe. And this is primarily due to respect for each individual person. After all, according to the Germans, society consists not of a formless mass, but of individual people. And you have to learn to understand this.
Every day at exactly noon on Radio “Germany” - an analogue of our radio “Russia” - after the clock strikes, a phrase from the first article of the Basic Law is heard, namely: “Respect for the dignity and freedom of each individual person is immutable...”
So, maybe we should gradually learn to respect each other and simply change our communication style?
Berlin–Moscow
Hi BroDude. Happy New Year to you, thank you for being you. Without you, many questions would remain unanswered, and life would be much more difficult. Long life and prosperity to you.
So, let's get to my question. Just recently I came across the following words in one of the articles: . Everything seems to be extremely clear and understandable. Politeness, good manners. But what do these words mean in our realities? How to be polite in a world where everyone tries to spoil you, well-mannered people can be included in the Red Book, and letting a girl go ahead of you causes a real stir for the lady?
Answer
Hello buddy - welcome to you and your question. It's nice to know that we are helping to make sense of this damn complicated life. But let's put pleasantries aside and move on to the answer - it is categorical, adamant and firm.
First, let's remember our short one, which we wrote specifically so that you understand that politeness does not exist for beauty, but for business. Manners, good tone, gallantry are phenomena that have shaped our civilization. They did not arise yesterday or even the day before yesterday - politeness has always accompanied a civilized person. Of course, it has changed, so today it seems to us that politeness has retired, and only rednecks are walking on the street. In fact, if this were completely true, then each of us would still be living in a cave. But, glory to social evolution, we have gone far ahead of our prehistoric ancestors.
And if in the Middle Ages ostentatious politeness was part of the image of aristocrats, then modern times gave birth to a whole class of polite men who called themselves gentlemen. This is an Anglo-Saxon culture, which, nevertheless, infected the entire Western world. This is what is considered the ideal code of politeness for men. Don't be afraid of the "outdatedness" of gentlemanliness - politeness has never been the norm in absolute terms. Look at other eras. Do you see at least one where all the men were honest, fair and shook hands with the ladies? Cattle have always been, are and will be. And there will always be those who want to grind you into dust, trip you up, and destroy your fortune. You say that “well-mannered people can be included in the Red Book,” but you completely forget that this has always been the case. Being educated is a virtue, and only a narrow stratum of the population is endowed with virtues.
Therefore, you should not look at how it is customary to communicate in modern world. If you take average, then you will always come across mediocrities from whom there is no need to take an example. This does not mean that you need to become a pompous cockerel who will seem like a clown in any company. This means that you just need to raise your standards against societal norms. And this is simple, because no special cultural shifts occurred in 2017. Being polite still means letting a girl go ahead of you, handing her a handkerchief when she cries, or giving her a chair. Yes, such insignificant things are noticeable, but they are necessary for a full life. Modern realities do not contradict them.
In addition, you need to forget about the dull perception of reality, which tells you that absolutely everyone is trying to harm you. This is wrong. Today we live in much more calm and good-natured times than ever before. This is hard to believe, especially if you watch the news on TV, where every day someone is stabbed and raped. But if you spend comparative analysis with other eras, then the 21st century is the century of polite people. The world has never been so calm, people have never been so intelligent. It's strange to hear, but it's true. AND . So give humanity and yourself a chance. Being a polite person is more difficult than being a Pithecanthropus, but it is much more enjoyable. In addition, good manners and politeness are the basis of true self-respect and a good shield against personal degradation. In a society of abundance (it sounds mocking, but this is exactly what we live in) all this is extremely important.
Subject class hour: “I want to be polite.”
Target:
1. Reinforce with children the forms of polite addresses to each other, modeling the necessary situations; pay attention to the fact that kind words must certainly be combined with good deeds.
2. To develop moral and aesthetic qualities in children.
3. Develop the ability to use polite words and the development of students’ speech.
Equipment used:
signs with magic words: thank you, sorry, thank you, please be kind.
Progress of the event
Hello guys. Today, we will go to a magical land. Amazing people live in this country. These are the most polite and obedient children. Would you like to live in such a country? Why do you need to be polite? What else do we call polite words? Right! These are magic words. Did you know that learning magic is not at all difficult? You just need to have a very strong desire, and you will learn magic words and actions.
First of all, about magic words. What kind of magic words are these? It turns out that these are ordinary, simple, smart, useful and kind words. They became magical because it is simply impossible to live without them. What words are these? (Thank you, thank you, be kind, please, excuse me, forgive me)
Let's repeat them in chorus.
Do you remember these words well? I'll check now. Now I will read the story, and you, where necessary, insert the appropriate word.
One day Vitya went to the theater. On the tram he sat near the window. Suddenly a woman got on the tram. Vitya stood up and said: “Sit down,(Please) " The woman was delighted and thanked Vitya:("Thank you") The tram suddenly stopped. The boy accidentally pushed a man and immediately said:("Excuse me, please") .
The bell rang in the theater, Vitya headed to his seat. His place was in the middle of the hall, and he asked those sitting: “Permit me to pass,(Please) " Vitya walked over and sat down in his place.
Guys! Let's repeat the magic words that Vitya spoke.
Well done! Now let's play some scenes.
Mom sent you to your neighbor to get a book. How will you do it?
You want to invite your friends to your birthday party. How will you do it?
You are late for a meeting or a movie, you need to find out the time. How do you ask the time of a person passing on the street?
You cook homework. You're having trouble. How do you ask your sister or brother to help you?
Now please listen to A. Barto’s poem “Yesterday I walked along Sadovaya.”
What is it about?
Yesterday I was walking along Sadovaya,
I was so surprised -
White-headed boy
He shouted to me from the window:
- WITH Good morning!
Good morning!
I asked: - Is this for me? -
He smiled at the window
He shouted to someone else:
- Good morning!
Good morning!
For kids and adults
The boy waved his hand
Let's get to know him now:
This is Vovka - there is one!
What mood did you feel after reading the poem?
Reading the poem “If you are polite” by S. Marshak.
If you
Polite
And to conscience
Don't be deaf
You are the place
Without protest
Give in
To the old woman.
If you
Polite
In the soul, and not for show,
To the trolleybus
You will help
Climb
Disabled person.
And if you
Polite,
Then, sitting in class,
You won't
With a friend
Chatter like two magpies.
And if you
Polite,
Will you help?
you mom
And offer her help
Without asking -
That is, themselves.
And if you
Polite,
Then in a conversation with my aunt,
And with grandfather
And with grandma
You won't kill them.
And if you
Polite,
That's what you need, comrade
Always on time
Go to a squad meeting
Don't waste it
Comrades,
Arriving early
Minutes for the meeting
Hours to wait!
And if you are polite,
Then you are in the library
Nekrasov and Gogol
You won't take it forever.
And if you
Polite,
Will you return the booklet?
In a neat, not smeared
And the whole binding.
And if you
Polite, -
To the one who is weaker
You will be the protector
Do not shy away from the strong.
---
I knew one child.
He was walking with an important nanny.
She gave subtle
To kid
Upbringing.
Was polite
This Boy
And really, very nice:
Taking away from the younger ones
Ball,
He thanked them
"Thank you!" - said.
Not if you
Polite,
Then you give thanks
But the ball
The boy
Without asking
Do not take!
What rules are contained in this poem?
And now I will ask you a problem.
There are 26 students in grade 1A, and today they all listened in class about the magical power that words and actions have. How many children in this class will try from today to never do bad deeds, and always use magic words and do good deeds?
Well done! Time will pass, you will graduate from school and become builders, scientists, doctors... But no matter who you are, first of all you must grow up to be truly good people - kind, brave, honest, polite. And you also need to learn this, so that the words you say and the actions you perform arouse not sadness and annoyance, but a smile and joyful feelings in the people around you.
So, let's remember what words we met today?
What can we say goodbye to everyone?
Since I am a sorceress, from today I will watch you from the outside: what actions you will perform and what words you will use.
Thank you
Sorry
Thank you
Please
please.